But often when girls compliment they are EITHER testing you (which doesn’t happen often) or they really mean it and if so you shouldn’t talk it out. The person who replied to your email was being modest by saying you were too kind, rather than if she had merely said thank you. And who wants that? I could go so far as to say that when a performer, writer, director, producer or whoever thanks a critic for being kind, he or she is really insulting the critic. She keeps telling me "your so nice" wouldnt stop kissing me, wanted to a relationship after the deed, didnt know what to do. Usually I just mean they're out of my league and could get way better. What if the whole “nice” thing was re-framed for a moment: (Please bear with me as I will interchangeably use nice and kind). That spate of chuckle-getters came to mind a few days ago when a very thin book called On Kindness showed up in my mailbox. I usually say it out loud as a way to encourage him to aim higher-a lot of times, the guys who go for me don't think they could do better and so "settle" for me. The suggestion is that I was being kind about something that was not much more than so-so. 6 Truths About People Who Are Too Kind. Underneath that stance lurks something more questionable, I suspect. Today is National Voter Registration Day! I’ve had it said to me and it’s really a throwaway phrase – meaningless almost immediately after it’s said. We've compiled an extensive list of sweet things to say to her to suit any situation. He’d go out and do exactly what you say, not because maybe he wants to but because he says so and that would make you fall for him… We and our partners will store and/or access information on your device through the use of cookies and similar technologies, to display personalised ads and content, for ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. They Notice Your Similarities And Make Connections. I lay in bed wondering about this girl while my heart pounded. That’s what happens when you’re in demand. I was absolutely shocked that a girl could feel this way about me. Their attitude on "caring, sharing" is sympathetic. They're all for kindness and lean toward it being genuinely altruistic, at least in sufficient part, despite arguments from other quarters that it's grounded strictly in selfishness -- even in sexual desire. I think what people are saying with "Thanks for being kind" is often a tip-off to false modestly. Music is My Boyfriend ... Ashton would bring up Luke. At that moment what you said (or did) was amusing to him. sometimes guys that are a bit ''soft'' dont get very far with girls, generaly get taken advantage of and then get dumped. We all want to feel understood, especially in … What they're really saying is something like this: "We both know how good I am, but I'm not going to admit I think so (because that would be boastful) and the last thing I want to be caught at is bragging. And once they cease to have any meaning, a long skid has occurred on the slippery slope to mediocrity, and worse. And once standards have been compromised, they cease to having any meaning. and "Thank you!" I hung up before I found out her name. "That is very kind of you" is a polite way to say thank you, but usually as a refusal: That is very kind of you, but I don't need it. It’s not about becoming disrespectful, rude or treating her mean, but simply about being more masculine and ballsy. You know: The Italian Cuisine Diet Book, The Smart-Blonde Gag Collection. At least, that's what I sense. After all, there are so many things to talk about on any given day. 4. On behalf of the many people who are nice and kind: all of these assumptions are wrong. Coming up with sweet things to say to a girl can be tough for some of us guys because society has not always been supportive of men verbalizing their emotions. In a sense, she … Well that depends on the guy. No one can balk at gratitude for a job well done. ©2021 Verizon Media. What they say: “It’s whatever.” What they actually mean: “It is very significant and it is affecting every … (to a man) ️Jesteś taka miła. Have you ever found yourself wondering what things to say to a girl you like? "You're so sweet (thoughtful, awesome, etc)." Yes, perhaps my shying away from something that may seem cruel is a form of kindness. Almost invariably, they say the same sort of thing to me, something along the lines of "Thank you for being so kind. Maybe the people who are the nicest, most positive and uplifting are the ones who have gone through the most upheaval. Are You Too Nice? Just as he began to say something, I noticed Calum shake his head at him, and Ashton stopped. Being kind certainly isn’t a bad thing, it’s just something to watch out for if you are made to feel unhappy for the sake of others. What I will say is that anyone in the mood to thank a reviewer might want to keep it to something like, "I read what you said about me in your review. My conviction goes farther. Being nice generally implies being kind and respectful. So, we are here to help with that. She sounded sincere and I knew it wasn't a prank. I'm kind by nature as well but if some one says shit to me then fuck being an adult I might say or do shit back to them. were about all I had when I was sometimes overwhelmed. Being too nice definitely comes with negative connotations. Or you can reply to the girl that said your "too nice" with a big sarcastic "thank you". Mock titles of that sort, often based -- as so many mildly amusing jokes are -- on stereotypes. But that occasional hint of kindness -- call it mercy -- is saved for the lacking, not the accomplished. That could be a purely sweet comment saying that you are a great girl or it could be your not my type. What I don't say, although it may come through in my intentionally smiling manner, is that their telling me I've been kind annoys me somewhat. Because I'm a reviewer -- a critic writing about theater, music, books, movies, art, dance, opera -- I often come into contact with people who I've reviewed. I remember that a girl in 10th grade called my house one night and said that she liked me and wanted to spend time with me. The underlying message is that gratitude -- whether sincere or feigned -- is being expressed for a loosened adherence to standards. 02-08-2006, 03:52 PM #23 This is the translation of the word "You're too kind" to over 80 other languages. 5. Almost invariably, they say the same sort of thing to me, something along the lines of "Thank you for being so kind." The black girls at work say … I know I am evil, but I tend to be a smartass and like to get girls off their guard. You can say "I love you too" when the girl says it, that should get her as well. As a reviewer, I'm convinced that criticism is one of those times when kindness is not called for. Was in croatia, girl on the street said "your really cute" took her back to the apt we rented, started gettin down with the dirty. Superficially, I'm bothered because their thanking me for being kind implies that the enthusiasm I evidenced wasn't genuine but was my forgiving a performance we both knew had been flawed. Everyone sees that she’s flirting. Personally speaking, when I was seeing 4-5 women at once, they had to call me, come to see me and arrange dates to get me to spend time with them. Reveal her deepest secrets. Perhaps I am stretching the truth when I say, "I'm never kind, but I'm always fair." But you just can't find the right things to say? ", My response invariably is, "I'm never kind, but I'm always fair.". Be a gentlemen by all means – that’s an attribute that will never go out of style, … It could be that you're acting like a pushover. It gets my possibly too easily-gettable goat for any number of reasons. I appreciate it." All rights reserved. Ask A Dating Question - https://datinglogic.net/ask-a-question/Answer A Dating Question - https://datinglogic.net/forums/forum/qa/ You Avoid Confrontation At All Costs. If I think a guy could pull a smarter/hotter/more successful girl, that's when I say he's "too good" for me. Don’t give up on it unless she actually says, “Leave me alone!” because many times, a hot girl will need the extra push to get her out on a date. Saying You're too kind in European Languages. I could go so far as to say that but I won't, because I suspect it would only come out sounding unkind and unfair. You can say "I love you too" when the girl says it, that should get her as well. HARRY has been left heartbroken by the situation with his family after moving to the US, says pal Tom Bradby. So I'll pretend I know I'm not that good, and you'll think more of me for the nicely modulated demurral.". What I don't say, although it may come through in my intentionally smiling manner, is that their telling me I've been kind annoys me somewhat. The authors get admirably serious about the history of kindness as defined by various cultures over the millennium, bringing their considerations right up to Sigmund Freud and the post-Freudian present. Nevertheless, I read what is essentially a long-ish essay (114 6"x4" pages) by the revered psychoanalyst Adam Phillips and the respected historian Barbara Taylor. Good Girls Are Bad Girls That Haven't Been Caught 31- You're Too Kind. "You are very kind" is more of a compliment or observation: If you see someone sharing a sandwich or giving to a beggar, it would be appropriate to say "you are kind"|That is very kind of you My response invariably is, "I'm never kind, but I'm always fair." It's pretty simple: There's the kind of girl he wants to date, and the kind of girl he will eventually want to marry . Very few people actually enjoy fighting, so it's perfectly normal … I'm fully aware I can get my point across without being unpleasantly harsh or snide. ... It’s an “at that moment” kind of phrase. To enable Verizon Media and our partners to process your personal data select 'I agree', or select 'Manage settings' for more information and to manage your choices. I've often written about them favorably and because of that, they're inclined to thank me for my comments. ️Jesteś zbyt miły (if you are talking to a man) ️Jesteś zbyt miła (if you are talking to a woman) If you want to thank someone for their kindness, you can say: ️Jesteś taki miły. I know I am evil, but I tend to be a smartass and like to get girls off their guard. He smiled again and silently searched for what I needed. When my husband and I were dating, he did so many kind things for me that sometimes didn't know what else to say. We made it easy for you to exercise your right to vote. When I say you’re too nice that’s what you are. A decade or so ago, several (hundred) jokes made the rounds having to do with thin books. Yahoo is part of Verizon Media. Sign up for membership to become a founding member and help shape HuffPost's next chapter. Kindness in a critic implies he or she is compromising those standards. Information about your device and internet connection, including your IP address, Browsing and search activity while using Verizon Media websites and apps. Thank you. Find out more about how we use your information in our Privacy Policy and Cookie Policy. All in all, do not let others use your kindness for their own benefit. If your girlfriend said that you’re too nice to her, she’s trying to give you a hint that you don’t need to kiss her ass as much as you have been. Tap here to turn on desktop notifications to get the news sent straight to you. Please find below many ways to say You're too kind in different languages. Telling you how cute you look over Instagram is like walking up to you while you’re with a group of friends and kissing you. Actually though, my interest in the book stemmed from a personal take on kindness revolving around my own work. If you want to say that someone is too kind (more kind than needed) and exaggerates (in a negative way). Than as the conversation goes you could pick something she says and make another point from there. You can change your choices at any time by visiting Your Privacy Controls. "Yup," I thought to myself, "these days it makes sense that something of such meager size is all anyone might scrape together about on the subject of kindness.". Well that's okay, it happens! Synonym for It's very kind of you. They are both natural. If I say, “you’re too much,” I mean you are unexpectadely funny. Only recently has there been a huge push toward communication that reflects what's really in our hearts. Criticism is founded on holding up -- and also holding to -- standards. The message there is that you've assumed the critic meant what was said, that a fair assessment was made and distributed. TRYING TOO HARD. Part of HuffPost Entertainment. I think it's all about context, too. There are some cons to telling a man exactly what it is, especially, if he is “desperate”. Okay, I will admit there are times when I may be kind, but it's only when I think something is much worse than I let on. Anything funny (not desperate) just joke a little but act like you’re serious in a funny way. You need to have a bit more balls and stop letting her push you around. If you ask most guys, they will say men see girls as two different types. I still maintain that any praise I've dispensed has been based on a conviction about what's been put before me. ... "You're too kind," I accepted. If she trusts you with that kind of information, it means she’s serious about keeping you in her life–for a long time. I am going to discuss some truths about people who may be too kind, and putting others wants and needs above their own. Bradby was a guest at Harry and Meghan’s 2018 wedding and … Creating a conversation out of thin air can be a challenge. Too nice doesn't work for most of us for a number of reasons. Like you ’ re too nice that ’ s what you are that was not much than. 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Being unpleasantly harsh or snide sign up for membership to become a member! Is compromising those standards Caught 31- you 're acting like a pushover nicest! Have n't been Caught 31- you 're so sweet ( thoughtful, awesome, etc ). exaggerates ( a. Gets my possibly too easily-gettable goat for any number of reasons desperate ) just joke a little but like... Left heartbroken by the situation with his family after moving to the US, says pal Tom Bradby to! Next chapter Usually I just mean they 're inclined to thank me for my comments may seem is. Pal Tom Bradby was made and distributed up in my mailbox re in.... So ago, several ( hundred ) jokes made the rounds having do! To become a founding member and help shape HuffPost 's next chapter disrespectful rude! Music is my Boyfriend... Ashton would bring up Luke critic implies he she. Praise I 've often written about them favorably and because of that sort, often based -- as many. 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About your device and internet connection, including your IP address, Browsing and search activity while using Media. That moment what you said ( or did ) was amusing to him something that may cruel... 80 other languages want to say to a girl you like shape HuffPost 's next.... Becoming disrespectful, rude or treating her mean, but simply about being more and! Say, “ you ’ re too much, ” I mean you are easily-gettable for! No one can balk at gratitude for a number of reasons putting others wants needs... We are here to turn on desktop notifications to get girls off their guard her to suit any.. Is “ desperate ” you to exercise your right to vote to.!